By: Dr. Portia Lockett, PhDH

There is no right way or wrong way to grieve. Because grieving is extremely personalized and individualized, it is possible some may not even recognize they are grieving. You may also find that coping with a loss of someone or something you love may feel like one of your life’s biggest challenges. Even subtle losses can trigger a sense of grief. Nonetheless, the important aspect of grieving is to ensure you are pursuing healthy ways to deal with the grieving process.

While everyone mourns differently, identifying the type of grief is a great help towards pursuing healthy ways to adapt, heal, and recover. Everyone has an idea of what grief looks like, when, in actuality, grief is different for everyone. However, what we can identify are the top three various types of grief.

3 Common Types of Grief

1. Normal Grief. Normal grief is a contradiction. There is no normalcy when it comes to grieving. Nonetheless, what has been defined as ‘normal grief” is the ability to move forward emotionally towards acceptance of the loss. An indicator of normal grief is that there is a gradual decrease in the intensity of emotions. This occurs because of processing and talking about your internal emotional thoughts. This segment of mourners makes continued progress towards healing and recovery.
2. Chronic Grief. Unlike normal grief, indicators of chronic grief are prolonged feelings of hopelessness, a sense of disbelief that the loss is real, and continued avoidance of any situation that may remind them of the loss. This grief could possibly last for years. If left untreated, chronic grief can develop into severe clinical depression, suicidal thoughts, or possible substance abuse.
3. Traumatic Grief. This type of grief that usually occurs when the death of a loved one is sudden. It is an intense type of grief with ongoing difficulties interfering with everyday life. This type of grief often shakes one’s security. Coping is two-fold, first the death and second, the traumatized loss. If left untreated, this type of grief can impact one’s mental health and result in a post-traumatic stress disorder.

You Can Recover

Mourning the loss of a loved one is perhaps one of the biggest challenges you will face in life. With no right or wrong way or a scheduled timetable for recovery, the important thing is to pursue a healthy process towards recovery. Recognize your life will never be the same for you will always remember the loss. However, recovery is possible. Rest assured your mourning is only temporary for we can hold fast to the Bible reference at Revelation 21:4, “And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away.” So, while there is no timetable on overcoming grief, we have the confidence in God’s word that grief and grieving is only temporary.